Youth Health and Psychological Education

The core of adolescent healthy psychological education has never been to "eliminate negative emotions" and cultivate "perfect children" who are always cheerful, but to help children build the underlying psychological flexibility of "coexisting with emotions, reconciling with themselves, and adapting to the environment" - rather than letting children never fall, it is more important to enable them to get up after a painful fall, and not to feel that their life is ruined just because of one fall.

I have been a resident psychology teacher in a provincial key middle school for eight years. I have seen too many parents regard psychological education as an "emotional vaccine." They think that enrolling their children in two emotional intelligence classes and reading two psychological picture books will ensure that their children will not have troubles in their lives. Last month, I met the mother of a freshman in high school. She cried while holding the "Sunshine Boy" certificate her child received in elementary school. She said that her child fell to the 200th place in her grade in the mock test and was locked in a room for three days and refused to talk. "I gave him so much psychological development before, but it didn't work at all?" ”In fact, it’s useless because many people have misunderstood the purpose of psychological education from the beginning: You can’t ask a person to never catch a cold for a lifetime, and you can’t ask a child to never be sad, frustrated, or angry.

Interestingly, there are actually two completely different schools of thought in the academic community regarding the implementation of adolescent psychological education. One school is the traditional "problem intervention school", which advocates focusing resources on children who are already prone to emotional disorders and using professional methods such as cognitive behavioral therapy and family therapy to intervene. The advantage is that it can quickly and accurately solve the existing problems and avoid worsening of the situation. Last year, our school cooperated with the Jingwei Center to provide follow-up intervention for 23 children with severe depression tendencies for six months. In the end, 80% of them successfully returned to class. ； But the shortcomings of this school are also obvious. Just like putting out a fire, by the time you smell the smoke, the fire may have burned to the rafters. Many children are sent to the school by their parents when they drop out of school and tend to self-harm. They have been carrying it for a year or two, and the psychological damage has long been formed.

The other school is the "resilience construction school" that has become increasingly popular in recent years. It advocates embedding psychological education into daily teaching and family interactions, without waiting for problems to be remedied. For example, our school launched the "Emotional Tree Hole" activity two years ago. We put a locked wooden box in the corridor of each grade and told students that they can write anything without signing. We will not judge whether it is right or wrong, but will sort it out and give responses every week. A girl in the second grade of junior high school wrote, "I think my parents only love me who ranks first in the exam. If I fail in the exam, they won't even give me a meal." Our reply was not preaching, "You must understand your parents' painstaking efforts." We just wrote, "It feels really uncomfortable to be treated differently. I would also feel aggrieved." Half a month later, the girl went to the psychology room to chat with me. She said that she had been holding back for more than half a year and was afraid to speak out because she was afraid that she would be scolded as "ignorant" if she spoke out. She didn't expect anyone to really understand her. Of course, there are also voices of opposition from this group. Many principals and parents feel that this kind of activity is "too frivolous" and cannot quickly improve scores or produce outstanding political achievements. They will lose the patience after doing it twice.

Speaking of this, I have to mention the recently hotly debated proposal of “incorporating psychology courses into the scoring of high school entrance exams.” Supporters say that this will force schools and parents to pay attention, otherwise psychology courses will always be leftovers occupied by mathematics, physics and chemistry.”； Opponents also have a point. Once it is linked to scores, the originally relaxing psychology class will just become another test-taking subject that requires memorizing standard answers. Children will also have to memorize "correct ways to express emotions", which will add to the burden. To be honest, as a front-line practitioner, I feel that there is no need to make it so complicated. First of all, it is better to implement the two clauses of "no occupying psychology classes" and "no public notification of students' psychological consultation records" than any pretense. Last year, the psychology class in the third grade of our school was occupied for half a semester. I took the 17 questionnaires screened out for students with self-harm tendencies to the principal. He informed all the teachers that day to return the psychology class.

After doing psychological education for so many years, my biggest feeling is that there is never a unified standard answer to this matter. It does not mean that if you follow what an expert says, your child will be mentally healthy, nor does it mean that if your child has negative emotions, it means "psychological education has failed." A while ago, I met the second-year junior high school girl who left a message in the tree hole. She still failed in the mid-term exam, but she smiled and said to me, "I had a fight with my parents and said everything I wanted to say. My dad took me to eat skewers yesterday and said that I can do better next time." You see, where is the need for any complicated theory? To put it bluntly, parents ask less, "How did you get such a low score in the exam?" and ask more, "Did you have anything happy at school today?" and teachers scold less, "Why are you so useless?" and give more confidence, "It's okay if we didn't do well this time. Let's take our time." This can help children know that "even if I'm not perfect, even if I have emotions, there are people who love me, and I can go on well." This is already the best psychological education.