mental health mottos

A truly useful mental health maxim is never a "behavioral ruler" to restrain you, but a "soft cushion" to help you catch your falling emotions. No sentence can be universally applicable to everyone. Only the one that just hits your current needs is effective.

Two months ago, I met a girl who works as an Internet operator at a community psychological service station. She has hundreds of compiled "Emotional Management Quotes" in her mobile phone album. The top one is "Emotional stability is the most advanced cultivation for adults." That day, she revised eight versions of the project plan but was still rejected by the client. When she was squatting in the stairwell and crying, she read this sentence and collapsed even more - even crying felt like she was "not mature enough", which was equivalent to stepping on another emotional wound.

It's quite interesting to say that counselors with different orientations have very different preferred aphorisms and styles, and sometimes they even "fight" with each other. Psychoanalytically oriented counselors mostly prefer expressions that allow emotions to flow, such as "Occasionally losing control of emotions is because the psychological immune system is working normally." In their view, forcing oneself to suppress negative emotions is the root cause of psychological problems. ； Cognitive-behavioral (CBT) counselors are more inclined to help people clarify their boundaries, such as "You are not responsible for everyone's emotions," which essentially helps you get rid of the unreasonable belief that "I must satisfy everyone." ； Practitioners of existential psychology prefer expressions such as "Life has no meaning, it is what you give it." They value individual independent choices more than being kidnapped by worldly standards of success. No one is right or wrong, it’s just that the people they are suitable for are different.

I know a senior who has been working as a family consultant for ten years. She doesn’t even have a plaque with famous quotes in her office. On the inside of the drawer, her daughter, who is in elementary school, has written “Eat a strawberry sundae if you’re not happy” in a crooked way. There’s also a crumbled ice cream picture next to the words. Last year, she received three domestic violence-related cases in a row. When she finished the last consultation, she was so emotionally exhausted that she couldn't even stand still. When she lowered her head and saw this sentence, she actually went around to the convenience store downstairs and bought a sundae, sat on the roadside and ate it for ten minutes before she recovered. Do you have any profound psychological truth behind this statement? Actually no, but for her at the time, it was more effective than anything said by any academic master.

Many people always think that mental health mottos must be spoken by celebrities and must be positive, but this is not the case at all. I had a depressed man who had just returned to school visit me before. His mother always sent him messages like "Come on, you are the best" and "Tomorrow will be better." He said that every time he saw it, he wanted to throw his phone out of the window. During that time, the motto he posted on his pencil case was written by himself, "If you can get up and brush your teeth today, it's already a perfect score." This sentence stayed with him throughout the three-month adjustment period when he returned to school.

I also have a few "private mottos" with no origin in my mobile phone memo, which I jot down casually when chatting with visitors or colleagues: One sentence was told to me by a girl who finally got rid of her anxiety disorder last year, "When you feel uncomfortable, just feel your pulse. As long as you are alive, you are already solving the biggest problem."”； Another sentence came up when a friend who was doing youth counseling complained, "When someone says you think too much, you can reply to them that you know shit." I have forwarded this to several clients with a pleaser personality, and they all said that it is very comfortable to use. ； The last one is the sentence "Eat a strawberry sundae if you're not happy." Last time, I had a four-hour supervision meeting and my headache was so bad that I felt like I was going to explode. When I saw this sentence, I actually went to a convenience store and bought one. I sat on the roadside and ate it, and I felt much better.

You really don’t need to deliberately collect some “must-read mental health quotes”, nor do you need to copy them down in a notebook and force yourself to follow them. This thing is like a band-aid that you keep in your bag at all times. When you accidentally scratch the skin, just take it out and use it. If it doesn't fit the size or is dusty, just throw it away. It's something that's meant to serve you, so don't let it kidnap you.