What are the relationships between parenting and children’s health?

In fact, the relationship between parenting and children's health has long gone beyond the narrow scope of "having enough food, clothing, warmth and less illness". From physiological development, mental state to long-term healthy behavioral background, almost all are shaped little by little by the daily and detailed parenting choices. Innate genes can only frame the upper and lower limits, and the huge space in between is basically filled by parenting.

You can see the most intuitive example if you just go to the pediatric clinic. Children who have just entered elementary school. Some have myopia of 200 to 300 degrees and are also accompanied by obesity and precocious puberty. Some have run for two hours without blushing or panting. When asked about family parenting habits, the difference can be multiplied several times: the former are mostly chasing after feeding since childhood, with no limit on high-sugar snacks. After school, they sit on the sofa and watch tablets. They go downstairs to play for half an hour because they are afraid of falling or being exposed to the sun.； The parents of the latter are on the contrary, "rough" and starving after meals. They go out and play for two hours every day, and they only play with their tablets once a week. This is where the most vociferous controversy of “intensive vs. extensive parenting” comes into play: Many parents feel that they need to provide their children with the most sterile environment, sterilizing tableware and toys time after time, and spraying alcohol on everything they encounter when going out. However, clinical data shows that children who grow up in an excessively clean environment for a long time have about 30% higher incidence rates of allergies, asthma, and repeated respiratory infections than children who are moderately exposed to environmental microorganisms. Both opinions have audiences, and the core is actually the grasp of the degree. The principle of "too much is not enough" has always been applicable in parenting.

Don't think that parenting only affects the body. The emotional feedback hidden in daily life has a much more profound impact on the child's mental health. I once met a mother who brought her third-grade child to the doctor for consultation. She said that her child kept complaining of headaches and stomachaches. She checked all over her body and found no organic problems. It was only when we talked about studying that she realized that this mother had been focusing on homework since the first grade. She would scold a wrong oral arithmetic question for ten minutes and punished her by copying the entire test paper if she failed to score 90 points. The child had physiological nausea as soon as he sat at the desk. This is a typical psychosomatic disease induced by high-pressure parenting. There are also many parents who talk about "I won't want you if you don't obey me." This kind of casual threat sounds like nothing, but if it happens too often, it will eat away at the child's sense of security. When they grow up, they are more likely to have anxiety and intimacy disorders. These have long been included in the assessment of children's health. It is not just a fever or a cold that is considered a health problem. Another controversial point in the past two years is "should frustration education deliberately seek punishment for children?" Some people think that if children are suppressed and made things difficult when they are young, children will not grow up to be heartless. There are also long-term tracking data that show that deliberately creating meaningless frustrations will not only fail to improve frustration resistance, but will put children in a long-term state of high stress. Cortisol levels will continue to be high, which will affect the development of the prefrontal lobe of the brain. The two views are still inconclusive. The only consensus is not to impose adults' anxieties on children in the shell of "for your own good."

Looking from afar, the health concepts passed on subtly during the parenting process are actually engraved in the children's lifelong behavior patterns. Just like you can rarely raise children who love sports and eat a balanced diet in a family where they lie on the sofa every day, check their mobile phones, and order takeout. On the other hand, if the parents themselves have the habit of regular exercise and are not picky about food, the children will follow suit. A previous public health survey that tracked for 10 years showed that the probability of children becoming obese as adults is 47% lower in families whose parents have regular exercise habits than those whose parents do not exercise all year round. The impact of this intergenerational transmission has long gone beyond the short-term scope of "less illness in childhood."

To put it bluntly, the relationship between parenting and children's health is a bit like cultivating soil for a sapling. The water you pour, the fertilizer you apply, and the shade you provide may seem like trivial matters, but they will eventually turn into the texture and growth of the tree. There is no universal standard answer. Adjust according to the child's condition, and you will never make too big a mistake.